Dear Jack,
I got together with some old roommates from college today. It was a girl's day through and through, which was great. I hadn't seen Lacey since the summer, and Seanna and Marianna since I moved to Salado a month and a half ago. Sara was the only one missing. She's actually in California visiting family and doing some sort of Catholic mission. She was missed.
As I was sitting at dinner with Seanna (the other girls had to leave a bit earlier, longer drives than I had), I was struck by the fact that out of all the "friends" I had in college, my circle of influence remained quite small. I can name 5 people who I actually attempt to keep in touch with. Everyone else has simply faded away, as if I never really knew them in the first place.
A small part of me wonders if I did, or if any of them truly knew me.
I explained to Seanna that I thought it really wasn't that odd that I came away from college with so few people that I considered a friend... I know to some people I seem crass, superficial, judgemental, or superior minded. What these other people never realized was that there are different levels to a person. It's always easy to assume that "what you see is what you get", but in my case, that was just not so. My friends are the people that bothered to look past those fronts, to scale the depths to find what was truly me.
All of those things I am, but there is also a part of me that has to knock on the back of every wardrobe door because I'm convinced that there is a portal to Narnia out there, somewhere. I just have to keep looking to find it. The people that go through the wardrobe and look into my soul... those are the people worth keeping as friends.
Always,
John (someone who considers you a friend) :)
Sunday, January 28, 2007
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Politics
Dear Jack,
Forgive the ranting. My temper has flared in the most eloquent ex-English major way, and I'm about to vent against the politicians of the world. I don't care whether they are right-wing conservatives, left-wing radicals, zealots, terrorists, or just someone with a different political world view than the one I hold... There is a certain level of decorum which I expect to be upheld in this country, and frankly, I find it insulting when it is not.
When did politics cease to be about the issues at hand, both in the world at large and in our home country? Yes, President Bush just addressed countless issues in his State of the Union address, but was I the only one who seemed to think that he said a whole lot without saying anything? Granted, I was silently protesting by reading Entertainment Weekly during the majority of the speech, but I figured (being a Republican by a naturally conservative nature) that I would tend to agree with him on the majority of issues which he addressed.
And really, I'm not here to talk about the issues. I'll leave that to people more politically aware than I am, but seriously. All this talk about the war and what we are doing that is both right and wrong in Iraq has got to stop. The facts are these. We are there, whether or not we like it, and as pulling out completely and all at once is a suicidal option for not only the Iraqi people, but the United States as a whole, we need to freaking shut up about it. But I'm going to stop talking about things which I really know nothing about. I think that other people (especially those in positions of political power) should FOLLOW MY LEAD.
When I was little, I wanted to be the first woman President of the United States. I can honestly say that is a job I no longer wish to apply for. When did politicians cease to be people? Real people with feelings, and convictions, and emotions? When did a simple question like "How is your son?" suddenly morph into a political soapbox for an already explosive issue? How can it be that propaganda has replaced a forum in which it is correct to speak civilly about issues? And yes, I realize that the rhetorical values of the President asking about another senator's son is really just a tool to perpetuate goodwill, I do not think that he did it with any intention to throw the fact that this senator's son was still in Iraq. Yes, emotions run high in situations like these, but why drag an innocent question of a HUMAN BEING'S health into a political circus, simply to convey a point which we, as the INTELLIGENT American public already know that you hold.
Which, conveniently brings me to my next point. When did we, as American citizens, suddenly morph into the mindset of a twelve year old. I don't know about you, but I hold two college degrees. I am perfectly capable of not only constructing a complex sentence, but I can (contrary to popular belief) understand them. I recognize when I am being insulted, and coddled, and lied to. And, if Jim Webb thinks that he is the be-all-to-end-all voice of the democrats of the world, let me tell you a little thing or two about rhetoric and the use of the word proper...
The belief systems held in the world are as varying as the people in it. That is what makes this country great. The second that you start forcing your belief system on me (and by the use of the word "proper" in reference to how you think the war in Iraq should be ended), that is the second that I start to be insulted.
What if I don't agree with what you think is proper? Does that make me wrong, and therefore "improper"...? There is no room left for error there. Either you are right, or you are wrong. Count me among the simpletons, but maybe, just maybe, to a Texas girl like me, that phrase does not really cross those party lines and heal old wounds. Just because you think that something is right does not necessarily make it so. The same goes for me. I want the name of your speech writer and your rhetorician... They both need to consider the future outcomes of the job they are doing.
Always,
A very testy,
John
Forgive the ranting. My temper has flared in the most eloquent ex-English major way, and I'm about to vent against the politicians of the world. I don't care whether they are right-wing conservatives, left-wing radicals, zealots, terrorists, or just someone with a different political world view than the one I hold... There is a certain level of decorum which I expect to be upheld in this country, and frankly, I find it insulting when it is not.
When did politics cease to be about the issues at hand, both in the world at large and in our home country? Yes, President Bush just addressed countless issues in his State of the Union address, but was I the only one who seemed to think that he said a whole lot without saying anything? Granted, I was silently protesting by reading Entertainment Weekly during the majority of the speech, but I figured (being a Republican by a naturally conservative nature) that I would tend to agree with him on the majority of issues which he addressed.
And really, I'm not here to talk about the issues. I'll leave that to people more politically aware than I am, but seriously. All this talk about the war and what we are doing that is both right and wrong in Iraq has got to stop. The facts are these. We are there, whether or not we like it, and as pulling out completely and all at once is a suicidal option for not only the Iraqi people, but the United States as a whole, we need to freaking shut up about it. But I'm going to stop talking about things which I really know nothing about. I think that other people (especially those in positions of political power) should FOLLOW MY LEAD.
When I was little, I wanted to be the first woman President of the United States. I can honestly say that is a job I no longer wish to apply for. When did politicians cease to be people? Real people with feelings, and convictions, and emotions? When did a simple question like "How is your son?" suddenly morph into a political soapbox for an already explosive issue? How can it be that propaganda has replaced a forum in which it is correct to speak civilly about issues? And yes, I realize that the rhetorical values of the President asking about another senator's son is really just a tool to perpetuate goodwill, I do not think that he did it with any intention to throw the fact that this senator's son was still in Iraq. Yes, emotions run high in situations like these, but why drag an innocent question of a HUMAN BEING'S health into a political circus, simply to convey a point which we, as the INTELLIGENT American public already know that you hold.
Which, conveniently brings me to my next point. When did we, as American citizens, suddenly morph into the mindset of a twelve year old. I don't know about you, but I hold two college degrees. I am perfectly capable of not only constructing a complex sentence, but I can (contrary to popular belief) understand them. I recognize when I am being insulted, and coddled, and lied to. And, if Jim Webb thinks that he is the be-all-to-end-all voice of the democrats of the world, let me tell you a little thing or two about rhetoric and the use of the word proper...
The belief systems held in the world are as varying as the people in it. That is what makes this country great. The second that you start forcing your belief system on me (and by the use of the word "proper" in reference to how you think the war in Iraq should be ended), that is the second that I start to be insulted.
What if I don't agree with what you think is proper? Does that make me wrong, and therefore "improper"...? There is no room left for error there. Either you are right, or you are wrong. Count me among the simpletons, but maybe, just maybe, to a Texas girl like me, that phrase does not really cross those party lines and heal old wounds. Just because you think that something is right does not necessarily make it so. The same goes for me. I want the name of your speech writer and your rhetorician... They both need to consider the future outcomes of the job they are doing.
Always,
A very testy,
John
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
It's Gonna Be a Happy New Year...
Dear Jack,
(I've decided that all these blogs are going to be addressed to you specifically, whether they are actually for you, or not. Think something like The Screwtape Letters. Yes, as we are contemporaries, I thought I'd give your style a shot.)
It's turned cold here. We 've been moderately iced in for two days now. It's odd to think that when you look at the weather radar map, all of the white that stands for snow and the pink that represents ice has conglomerated in one spot, right here, deep in the heart of Texas (clapclapclapclap). Normally I love it when things like this happen, but sitting here, looking deep into a roaring fire just isn't the same when your boss is pacing around the living room, deeply concerned for the whereabouts of his partner.
It always amazes me the depths of emotion that one experiences when the safety of a loved one is on the line. The tension here is running deep. I wish he would stop pacing, but I can't deny him the one ounce of control that he has over the situation. He can't control the ice, he can't control his partner, but when it all comes down to it, he can control his reaction.
Apparently, his reaction is to pace. Alot.
What also amazes me is the fine line between worry and anger. Deep anxiety that easily changes to fear, frustration, and things you say that you didn't mean to at the time. Sometimes I think Thumper's Mom hit the nail on the head. "If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say nothing at all."
My kitten is also cold. I know this because she has curled up in my lap and buried her precious little nose into my leg. She's never quiet, or still, but today she is both. Wonders never cease.
This is so funny. I don't know what I'm writing about, Jack. All I know is that I have Peterson's voice in my ear saying "Just write. Who gives a crap? Something will come out of nothing, but you just have to keep on writing..." I wonder if he listens to his own mantras. I wonder how many freshmen he has corrupted with his "interesting" points of view. I wish I were back there somehow, talking to him. Me and you against the rest of the class. We were right more than we were wrong.
I miss that.
I don't wish that I could go back to college though, honestly. What I wish for is the companionship that college brought. People my age were never far away, whereas now people my age seem a lifetime away. I guess that's what I get for moving to Salado (aka, God's Waiting Room...). Being in New York again a week ago has made me realize again just how much I want to be there. Maybe I should reconsider my not wanting a Masters... I could go to NYU.
Whatever I decide, one thing is for sure. 2007 is going to be an interesting year. I like years that end in 7's. The last one changed my life, for the better. I hope it happens again. Somehow.
Always,
John
(I've decided that all these blogs are going to be addressed to you specifically, whether they are actually for you, or not. Think something like The Screwtape Letters. Yes, as we are contemporaries, I thought I'd give your style a shot.)
It's turned cold here. We 've been moderately iced in for two days now. It's odd to think that when you look at the weather radar map, all of the white that stands for snow and the pink that represents ice has conglomerated in one spot, right here, deep in the heart of Texas (clapclapclapclap). Normally I love it when things like this happen, but sitting here, looking deep into a roaring fire just isn't the same when your boss is pacing around the living room, deeply concerned for the whereabouts of his partner.
It always amazes me the depths of emotion that one experiences when the safety of a loved one is on the line. The tension here is running deep. I wish he would stop pacing, but I can't deny him the one ounce of control that he has over the situation. He can't control the ice, he can't control his partner, but when it all comes down to it, he can control his reaction.
Apparently, his reaction is to pace. Alot.
What also amazes me is the fine line between worry and anger. Deep anxiety that easily changes to fear, frustration, and things you say that you didn't mean to at the time. Sometimes I think Thumper's Mom hit the nail on the head. "If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say nothing at all."
My kitten is also cold. I know this because she has curled up in my lap and buried her precious little nose into my leg. She's never quiet, or still, but today she is both. Wonders never cease.
This is so funny. I don't know what I'm writing about, Jack. All I know is that I have Peterson's voice in my ear saying "Just write. Who gives a crap? Something will come out of nothing, but you just have to keep on writing..." I wonder if he listens to his own mantras. I wonder how many freshmen he has corrupted with his "interesting" points of view. I wish I were back there somehow, talking to him. Me and you against the rest of the class. We were right more than we were wrong.
I miss that.
I don't wish that I could go back to college though, honestly. What I wish for is the companionship that college brought. People my age were never far away, whereas now people my age seem a lifetime away. I guess that's what I get for moving to Salado (aka, God's Waiting Room...). Being in New York again a week ago has made me realize again just how much I want to be there. Maybe I should reconsider my not wanting a Masters... I could go to NYU.
Whatever I decide, one thing is for sure. 2007 is going to be an interesting year. I like years that end in 7's. The last one changed my life, for the better. I hope it happens again. Somehow.
Always,
John
Monday, January 15, 2007
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